Secretary of Beer
Pat is 24, though he lies about his age and most other aspects of his personal life (It is assumed with good reason). He has been the leader of the group since 1963. His hobbies are Budweiser, Michelob, and Guinness.
JIM PHALEN
Secretary of Women
Jim is 27 and an admitted electrical engineer. He stands 7'8" on a tall chair and is the acknowledged leader of the group. His hobby is staring bleakly into the void.
BOB YOUNG
Secretary of Gambling
Bob is tall for his height and at 27, he should be. The real spokesman for the group, Bob has been a disappointment for years. He excels at snoring and cleaning his plate.
LARRY ZABEL
Secretary of Loud Noises
At 28, Larry is the youngest elected leader of this tightly-knit organization. Larry's hobbies are giggling and combing his hair. Last book read: Horton Hears a Who.
BILL O'LEARY
Secretary of Music
A born leader, Bill says that being 28 is "real keen," and likes the bright, kicky fashions of today's youth. His motto is: "Go, Man, Go!" and it seems as if nothing can stop this way-out cat...Too Much!
TOM WELSH
Secretary of Whining
Tom is the real leader of this gang, a responsibility he accepts with pride and a snivelling attitude. He has no hobbies ("What would I do?"), and dreams of someday becoming a despot.
RICH WEST
Ringmaster
Mr. West is looked upon as a father by the Punks, as well as a majority of the high school girls in the area. He has not let his early defeats color his basically unwholesome outlook. He is a doomed man.
DAVE NUTTYCOMBE
Secretary of Over-Production
Short of stature and temper, with talent to match, Dave has developed a disturbing collection of character flaws into a truly grim personality. He has no friends.
DON HOGAN
Secretary of Bail
At 25, Don has let Life get the better of him and is now waiting for society to take care of what's left. He wears a hat.
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